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Mother discloses the pain of carrying triplets while knowing that one of them had perished, as well as the gift she gave her ‘angel baby’ so that she is ‘never alone.
A courageous mother who endured the second half of her triplet pregnancy knowing that one of her children had perished has revealed the heartfelt gift she gave her celestial baby daughter.
Mum-of-one Kirsty Alexander was ecstatic to discover she was pregnant with triplets, especially given her difficulty conceiving and the fact that her first child was delivered through IVF.
The 33-year-old woman from Kent never intended to have three children with her husband John, 39, but she fell in love with all three as soon as she learned of their existence. Regrettably, shortly before 18 weeks, a scan revealed developmental concerns in one of the infants.
It was after a follow-up scan at the hospital that we realized she had passed away. We were utterly devastated and brokenhearted.
Thus, Kirsty was forced to endure the remainder of her pregnancy with the knowledge that one of her infants was stillborn.
In October, Kirsty and John met with a consultant who examined her brain in greater detail and concluded that the baby’s death was due to a developmental issue.
Kirsty had quipped that the babies appeared like specks on the initial ultrasound scan, but after learning that one of the triplets had died, she and her husband were astonished by how much the infants had changed over the weeks.
She named their celestial baby Dotty thereafter, captivated by how much more they were than dots.
Kirsty spent the months following Dotty’s passing lamenting, but she was also terrified that she would lose the baby again when she gave birth.
She revealed, “The entire time I carried her, I felt she was secure and near to me, but I knew that once she was born, I would have to agonize again.”
Kirsty acknowledges that experiencing infant loss or a miscarriage requires a level of fortitude that is underrated, yet so many people endure in silence.
Dotty, Delilah, and Wilfred were born via cesarean section on March 6, 2019, at 36 weeks gestation.
She stated, “The first few weeks were terrible.” I felt like I couldn’t leave the house due to my escalating anxiety and fear that something else would happen to one of our survivors.
It was suggested that I begin expressing my sentiments and emotions, but I lacked the courage to discuss the incident face-to-face.
That’s when I began using Instagram to express my emotions. It helped tremendously to release some of the anxiety, distress, and rage I had pent up.
She added, “The resilience of any parent who has suffered a loss is phenomenal, but so many of them endure in isolation and do not receive the support they need and deserve.”
‘Conversation does help alleviate the burden of mourning, but parents need encouragement to feel they can open up in order to endure the most heartbreaking experience.
Whether you’ve lost a baby at three weeks, 30 weeks, or after birth, you have the right to grieve.
Each of those mothers and fathers is a mother and father, even if it’s to a celestial baby; they will always be parents to their child.